Sunday, July 10, 2011

Day 5: Things you want to say to an Ex

id have liked to keep this particular post short,
Just to prove that i am over my ex
Because according to society constantly talking about him or obsessing on the issue means i haven't moved on.
Truth is i have, its been over a year and i did end the relationship myself, even though it was hard, i finally got to a place where i can say i am rid of him.
so here it goes, if i could say things to him today here what i would say.

I cant believe i stayed with you for 6years even with all the physical abuse and the disgrace
i cant believe i stayed with you even though i knew we were both AS
I cant believe i talked myself into marrying you damn the consequences of both our families
I cant believe i justified the times you hit me, the times you embarrassed me in front of people
I cant believe you had the guts to still be the perfect boyfriend, to still sacrifice for me, to still do things that confused the hell outta me and made me believe you had changed.
I cant believe that after 6years of being the best girlfriend, your best friend, your pseudo-wife, standing by you through thick and thin, you cheated
I still cant believe that you cheated

I still cant believe that after 6years together you betrayed me,
not just our love but our friendship
I cant believe i almost went back to you after you cheated
I cant believe that i left you after the cheating and you went back to her and you are still with her 1year after
Most of all i cannot believe that even after all this, you still wanted to be friends
I cannot believe that i still let you use me, calling me to help u write cover letters for interviews and i obliged after all that happened
i also cannot believe i pretended to be alright with being friends with you this past year
the skype calls, phone calls you made, bbm conversations talking about our lives and where we were at,
trying to salvage the friendship that supposedly lay under our relationship.
i cant believe i tried to be the bigger person by being the girl that could handle being friends and discussing your relationship with the girl you cheated on me with, smiling and being the close friend after everything you did to me.

what i can believe though is this
that here i am 13months after you, stronger, hotter, way ahead in life, experienced, not so trusting but still with a heart full of love waiting for the right person, and i am finally DONE with your trifling ass
I can finally believe that, that person isnt YOU!


Unveilinggold said...

I like trhe last paragraph..You go girl ;)

Giagerry said...

"not so trusting but still with a heart full of love waiting for the right person"---(Y)

MsJB said...

Aww! Don't worry you'll find someone that will reciprocate all that love someday

H said...

I'm glad that's done.
He needed to cheat on u so u'd move on, cuz I c that u kept holding on despite and inspite of all that happened.

It clearly is for the best...and Mr. Right Guy is not too far away...stay strong.


Beautiful said...


@ilola said...

It must have been so painful, you are a strong woman. Thank God it is all over

CherryWine said...

Your resilience is so beautiful and I commend the fact that you spoke about domestic abuse, which a lot of people find painful and embarrassing. It was a painful moment for you, but the embarrassment and shame belongs to him; the spineless weasel who hits women and cheats on them. You are a strong woman and nothing is ever going to be able to keep you down. He's a jerk and he never deserved you. On to better things, my dear.

Rebirth said...

.....the right kind of love is on its way...glad you have moved on

Bombchell said...

*hugs* I'm happy your out of it, and wish your future is way more positive

BBB said...

thanks so much for the comments
i really have never talked about the happenings of that relationship, previously id made myself believe that it was a perfect 6years and i had excuses for all the drama, i guess the fact that i can talk about it now means i really have moved on :)

Dame Sting said...

You are a better person than me. It must suck that he went back to the chic he cheated with. Glad you moved on.

Niyi said...

Wow! Had Beyonce's 'Best thing i never had' playing on my mind as i read this...

Vickii said...

Lol at Niyi's comment. I love that song and would recommend you listen to it because like the song says, you are WAY too good for him!

I'm sorry you went through this but I have every faith that it has made you a stronger, better person for it. And well done on ending the relationship!

Please please please promise me you will never put up with physical or mental abuse again. Even "just one time". You are too good for that!

Niyi said...

Wow! Had Beyonce's 'Best thing i never had' playing on my mind as i read this...

@ilola said...

It must have been so painful, you are a strong woman. Thank God it is all over

No Limit said...

Glad you're out of the relationship... for the records, I can bet my last brass farthing that he went to the other 'cos no other woman will put up with his cheating behind!

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